Do you have any idea what a brain is?

Eatza Pizza is the best place in the city!! I went there today with Z.Diddy and Peet Peet and, once again, the whole atmosphere, environment and crowd was amazing. It felt like we were in the midst of some wild movie. The African-American midget wasn't working there though, so I was a bit disappointed. There was a kid there with a monstrous chin wearing black attire, which was awesome. I want to go there again tonight. Either there or Michael's because at Michael's they have this special deal where if you walk in wearing a ball cap the hostess will give you a free spanking. Now that's hot, y'all.

This Guy's An Absolute Bad-Ass!

This is the legendary Billy Swan, best remembered in the aurals of rock history for his hit, "I Can Help" from 1975. It's a somber, but very rockin' tune about a man who is itchin' to fuck and will do anything for it. This is best exemplified in lines such as, "I've got two strong arms, I can help" and "If your child needs a daddy, I can help." I don't know if he's part Asian, because of his surname "swan," but nevertheless, he rocks the house everytime I hear his quivering voice!

Scream Queens

"Take a big breath and eat anotha' grape."

Din-Din!

Lord am I starving! I don't know where I shall dine tonight, though. I mean, there's just so many extravagant places along the McGallard Strip! Maybe I'll invite Abe to Michael's again. I could tell he was head-over-heels in love with that meat-ball sub he had the last time! I think I would probably settle for the $4.99 plate of sauteed beef they have that is just TO DIE FOR!

Well, that's about all I've got to say. I'll let you cute readers know how it went with a "follow-up" post detailing my menu choice, along with other silly tid-bits from the night. See ya!

Let's Get Cute

First post, everyone! In it, I shall reveal my favorite album title of all time.... Okay, here we go!

My favorite album title of all time is the esteemed "Psychic, Powerless...Another Man's Sac" EP by our beloved Butthole Surfers! And look, I shall even provide the cover of this treasure. Give it a listen, it's very cute!

$0.50 Chicken Balls

So, for those of you who havent heard, I spent a HEFTY amount of money on a bucket of cream-filled, buffalo chicken balls at the Lock Room this weekend. Needless to say, I was ticked off! They were pretty fulfilling, though. But the real reason I was/am so steamed is because on the menu on the wall it simply stated: "Daily Special - $0.50 Chicken Balls." I'm not totally sure the menu called them "balls" but it was something along those lines....

So I tell the petite waitress I want some, she asks how many (in multiples of 6), I say 12. Now, since the shit was advertised as a "special," I assumed I would get the bucket for cheap. You know, like 6 balls for fifty cent! But no, I ended up paying a whopping $6, which could've been used for a number of tasty things, like a chocolate shake at the McDonald's, or a bottle of Mad Dog, or even a matinee ticket to see "Body of Lies."

Now, in order to receive the vengenance that I well deserve, I'm going to go to the Locker Room THIS upcoming Friday night and order a single chicken sphere for $0.50 just to show those M.F-ers how absurd their "special" is!!